Saturday, 3 May 2014

Short posts, most unfinished

I decided to write what I can in the time that I have, so some of my posts will be unfinished.  That is primarily how my day goes. The only thing that I do in a day from start to finish is take care of my daughter, and really that is all that counts.  If she is fed, clean, happy and sleeps well, the rest can go to...... Even though logic tells me this, my need to have a clean house is obsessive.  But how to clean a house, with baby demands, my own demands (food, sleep etc) and a natural laziness!?  Oh! throw in some grieving and planning a funeral as well as a Baptism and voiola!! What I want to do is pushed to the side AGAIN!  But I have to say I am a master procrastinator, so If I had only done my projects pre-baby and pre-family issues, well they would be done.

Today seems to be a particularly awesome day. My bathroom is cleaned top to bottom and I made an original lunch recipe and it tastes awesome!!  My husband will complain, but he always does, so I don't really care, lol I am fearing the end of the day though.  I have no tasks to do in relation to the funeral so far today, I have had happy thoughts of my father, memories of things we did, said, I even used his bbq sauce recipe for my lunch, and no tears, no helplessness.  Tonight I will probably have a meltdown or even question my loyalty to my father if I am so easily moving on.

That is all for today. Just so you know this is my first blog and I am not sure yet what format or what I am bringing to the blog.  Stick around or don't, comment or don't.

Thank you for reading

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